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Nikki178 · Post by **Nikki178** » 14 years ago

I feel like crap right now. I've got a cough, I don't get any sleep and I had a huge fight with my siblings last night because they accused me of not being here for my mom. I'm at work! They have the luxury of being here because they're on summer break! They don't understand how being so far off from my mom feels. All they see is that I'm not here and that they doo all the manual labor.

Sorry if I'm turning this forum into a personal blog but my family and I need all the prayers. My grandfather was rushed to another hospital's ER last night and my mom is still in the neuro ICU. I now have two family members confined in two different hospitals.

irishoreo · Post by **irishoreo** » 14 years ago

LiberAeterna wrote:
irishoreo wrote:Today, I'm quite saddened and I cannot think. I just received the call that my beloved grandmother, my mother, the woman whp has taken care of me for 18+ years, has just passed away in her sleep at the hospital. I'm stuck doing my overnite at work. Noone is answering the phones. Not my supervisor, my manager, my house lead, the director of operations, the on-call, the back-up on call, no one. I cannot call another house because there is no other individual right now doing an overnite is trained for my house. Me not being able to get out of work is the only reason why I am on the computer.

I can no longer cry, i believe I have just cried myself out, or maybe im going back and forth between shock and crying. I still don't know what to think, what to do, how to move on. Right now I am Libera on full blast in some attempt to get myself to calm down in any sense because I know my grandmother does not want me freaking out...I just can't think....
Deshaun, even though I am new here, I just wanted to say that my heart goes out to you for your loss . There is nothing more painful than the loss of a loved one, especially one who was so important in your life. Take solace in knowing that she is still with you in spirit. I lost a grandmother in Aug. 2003 and my dear father only a few months later near Christmas 2003. My grief was almost unbearable and I wish now I had Libera's music in my life at that time. It took time, but through the support of friends and family I have come to terms with their passing. I stuggle myself on a daily basis with many things but the angelic singing of Libera continues to help me through the tough times. Having read some of the heartfelt responses already, please, know that you have many friends here who stand by you in your grief. Libera has brought us all together and can help heal all our wounds.

Todd

Thank you Todd, it is much appreciated and you are correct Libera has brought all together. I have no shame to blast Libera in my car with the windows down because it calms me and i just no longer care what others think.

irishoreo · Post by **irishoreo** » 14 years ago

Nikki178 wrote:I feel like crap right now. I've got a cough, I don't get any sleep and I had a huge fight with my siblings last night because they accused me of not being here for my mom. I'm at work! They have the luxury of being here because they're on summer break! They don't understand how being so far off from my mom feels. All they see is that I'm not here and that they doo all the manual labor.

Sorry if I'm turning this forum into a personal blog but my family and I need all the prayers. My grandfather was rushed to another hospital's ER last night and my mom is still in the neuro ICU. I now have two family members confined in two different hospitals.

Nikki you are in my thoughts! Your siblings are just now trying to find something or someone to blame and unfortunately that had befallen onto you. Do not waiver stay strong, take care of yourself and keep thinking about your mother, do not worry about them right now. I'm sorry to hear that your grandfather is in the er now and I hope everything is alright with him! I'm sorry that this news has come to you(this easter just isn't the best for either of us this year is it?) Your mom understands what you do and how you feel, I know she knows that you would rather be there for her 24 hours a day 7 days a week, but she would not want that. Try and get some sleep and take care of that cough. Being tired and sick will not help your mom, so take care of yourself so you will be able to help take care of your mother. Hopefully your siblings will see the right path and lay off you soon and actually think, if not oh well and as I said do not worry about them. Take care and you are in my thoughts, these times are extremely hard and I know that so I send the strength that I have been given to you to hold strong.

Nikki178 · Post by **Nikki178** » 14 years ago

Thanks irishoreo! You really know what to say... Easter has always been the best holidays for me because my family goes to our beach house. This year though is the most challenging.

I hope our families' next Easter won't be as unusual as this one.

jesuspeace34 · Post by **jesuspeace34** » 14 years ago

Nikki178 wrote:I feel like crap right now. I've got a cough, I don't get any sleep and I had a huge fight with my siblings last night because they accused me of not being here for my mom. I'm at work! They have the luxury of being here because they're on summer break! They don't understand how being so far off from my mom feels. All they see is that I'm not here and that they doo all the manual labor.

Sorry if I'm turning this forum into a personal blog but my family and I need all the prayers. My grandfather was rushed to another hospital's ER last night and my mom is still in the neuro ICU. I now have two family members confined in two different hospitals.

You don't have to apologize. We are your friends here and we're here for you when you need us. I am sorry that you are going through so much difficulty right now. You and your family are in my prayers.

Narnian · Post by **Narnian** » 14 years ago

Nikki178 wrote:I feel like crap right now. I've got a cough, I don't get any sleep and I had a huge fight with my siblings last night because they accused me of not being here for my mom. I'm at work! They have the luxury of being here because they're on summer break! They don't understand how being so far off from my mom feels. All they see is that I'm not here and that they doo all the manual labor.

Sorry if I'm turning this forum into a personal blog but my family and I need all the prayers. My grandfather was rushed to another hospital's ER last night and my mom is still in the neuro ICU. I now have two family members confined in two different hospitals.

I will pray for your family and you too.

"I will lift up my eyes to the hills - From whence comes my help?
My help comes from the Lord, Who made heaven and earth" (Ps.121:1-2) Be strong and please sometimes give us to know how are you and your family. God bless you.

P.S. I was made this special topic for prayer needs like this. And I believe that we have to support each other this way.

jesuspeace34 · Post by **jesuspeace34** » 14 years ago

Narnian wrote: P.S. I was made this special topic for prayer needs like this. And I believe that we have to support each other this way.

Thats a great idea. I think its important to have a special area where we can express ourselves when we need the prayers of others.

TEB · Post by **TEB** » 14 years ago

I like this thread idea and I am glad it was started.
Nikki,
I do understand where you are coming from as my older brother is/was "the favored one" while we were growing up. I was the 2nd born son to a set of parents who already had the son they wanted.
My prayers will be with you.

irishoreo · Post by **irishoreo** » 14 years ago

TEB wrote:I like this thread idea and I am glad it was started.
Nikki,
I do understand where you are coming from as my older brother is/was "the favored one" while we were growing up. I was the 2nd born son to a set of parents who already had the son they wanted.
My prayers will be with you.

That is hard Tom, I'm sorry if your childhood was less than stellar which was quite unfair to you!

TEB · Post by **TEB** » 14 years ago

irishoreo wrote:
TEB wrote:I like this thread idea and I am glad it was started.
Nikki,
I do understand where you are coming from as my older brother is/was "the favored one" while we were growing up. I was the 2nd born son to a set of parents who already had the son they wanted.
My prayers will be with you.

That is hard Tom, I'm sorry if your childhood was less than stellar which was quite unfair to you!

If we ever get to talk in real time, and face to face, I'll tell you all about it sometime. My parents didn't exactly hate me but it was very obvious who they favored. And it wasn't just me who noticed it.

Nikki178 · Post by **Nikki178** » 14 years ago

Thank you all.

I just want to share with you that my mom was extubated (as in all the tubes that were there to help her breathe) were removed a few days ago and she already started talking. Not whole sentences yet but a word or two. Still we believe that that is a huge improvement from when we came in last month.

Keep praying

heeh91 · Post by **heeh91** » 14 years ago

i will keep all of you in my prayers.

i posted last month when one of my dear friends, a barely 16 year old boy died. died on feb 27, born on valentines day. his heart was so loving. if jesus were a 16 year old boy, this friend would have been him. he had a special way of seeing when someone was having a bad day, and he would try his best to cheer them up. he was also one of the biggest 16 year olds you'd ever see. he was so tall, his hands and feet were just huge. he was so goofy. yet he was a gentle giant. one of his most common sayings was, "you're not leaving until i get a hug!" then he'd run up and squeeze you so tight. it is truly devastating to everyone who knew and loved him. recovery is still happening.

well, on monday, the bandage was ripped off of the first wound, another friend died. he was 19 years old. one of the most unfortunate aspects of his death is that he was struck by a car, and the driver was his best friend.

many many people in my school and community are hurting very badly right now and need prayer. especially the families that have been affected by these losses.

god bless.

Narnian · Post by **Narnian** » 14 years ago

Very very sad story... You are in my prayers, Heeh. And I will pray for ppl in school and comunity too.
God bless you.

irishoreo · Post by **irishoreo** » 14 years ago

Oi vey this year is just NOT a good year as fa as deaths are concerned! Heeh91 you are in my thoughts!

Nikki, THATS GREAT!!! Among all this sadness it's a blessing to see someone improve! I hope she continues to improve to at least an almost full state of health!

Nikki178 · Post by **Nikki178** » 14 years ago

Today is my brother's birthday and we're still in the hospital. My mom was able to scold my two siblings for pestering her. Haha. I never knew I would one day look forward to hear my mom go off on how annoying and stubborn her children are. :p