Next week the "If" album is going to be released. Since I'm having a stressful time these months, I am not sure when I'll find the time to write a review once I get the album. So I go for a "p'review", with some considerations that were
stirring in me since July, but I didn't want to go into detail here back then.
My first thoughts came up last year with the London concerts, when
Let Me Make Songs for the People and
Sing were performed for the first time. Harmlessly, I supposed that the pandemic caused Robert to write / take on songs which relate to the joy of music everyone, musicians and audience, was so urgently missing.
Then in July the track list was published. Usually, I like to have a look at albums if there's something superordinate to be found in a track list, which interconnects the songs or most of them. This one at first sight just seemed to become a very colourful mix and also covering a very long period of time. Still I thought that Robert might just have utilised the time of the pandemic, revisiting songs from early times, writing new ones, and I was simply looking forward to this musically very wide-ranged, promising album. But not much later, the sheet music bit of
Once an Angel appeared in a
Tweet by Libera and struck me with those lyrics "Remember the songs that we sang, will the memory of their music fade away? No more the [?] .... Once an angel, such an angel ...".
This song kept my mind really busy. Lyrics about singing angels, who are these angels? Libera is the closest to think of, right? But why past tense? Why talking about memories, while the choir exists? What did Robert aim at, why doubts about the angels' future and a touch of woe? I was wondering why no-one mentioned what to me looked like a concrete reference. Perhaps others simply dealt with it the same way: keep silent, not pour disquiet and negativity into the anticipation. I think it's alright to talk about it now though; somehow I feel I must get a few things off my chest.
In any case: With
Once an Angel suddenly something obviously more meaningful entered into my reflections and I had another look at the other pieces.
In terms of the lyrics and time range, the entire album seemed to me like a summary, looking back on Robert's times with the choir. This gave me the strange feeling that he'd consider this CD as his ultimate one with Libera under his aegis. Saying bye. BUT I was not aware of Robert being ill, let alone that ill. I assumed that he would just step by step
withdraw, ok, perhaps for some minor health reasons which nevertheless should not be ignored, as tours for example are tiring, that he would leave the main or more stressful tasks like rehearsing, conducting, touring to a successor and stay in the background himself. Pushing aside that artists rarely "retire" (and rather go on and on and on) by guessing that he'd still write a song or an arrangement for Libera every once in a while. I never guessed that something serious was going on behind the scenes or probably I directly blocked such thoughts and so I entirely focused on a possible retirement - not a nice thing either, but not remotely as sad.
What came to my mind at that point in time was:
Once an Angel - s. above
Let Me Make Songs for the People - something Robert has done for the largest part of his life, composing, arranging, creating and conducting a choir which brought his music to the people;, the anthem-like type of the music, like a statement
Sing - belongs to this type, too
If - just very melancholic, wishing for a change of a current situation, expressing a deep longing for something that's hard to come true. I didn't come to a conclusion what might have made him include this truly wistful song. As it was sung at the Christmas concert last year, I assigned it more to the pandemic and the problems which arose from that among many people, even though Robert is not the author of the lyrics. Now I would interpret it differently ...
Nearer My God to Thee - not wanting to think of anything very bad ... so I considered this as an expression of a strong belief, fitting in the collection of thoughtful pieces on this CD
Vespera - to finally and super-kindly give us this song (again and perhaps on stage) so much "cried" for by us, before he would retire
O Lord Support Us - I didn't have a look at the words of this song at that time, but with today's knowledge they make perfect sense, just like some other songs
Nunc dimittis with the well-known initial words "Lord, now lettest thou thy servant depart in peace" hit and moved me the second-most. Again there was the retirement idea: The servant in my eyes was the servant in church, the one who spread God's word through music, with Libera, with St. Philip's Choir, as an organist etc. and that this profession now was being planned to be handed over to someone else.
Furthermore, this is the oldest of the songs already known to us, dating even back to the Angel Voices time. And this made me first think of "taking stock"; the CD is like a film of life with the time span from the beginning up to the newest of the new. Then again, he could have chosen any other old song, but it was this one and I do think it's for the lyrics.
Lux Aeterna - just seemed to me like a peaceful leaving. Not this earth, only his tasks as Libera's director of music. Oh well.
This was all hard enough: that he was apparently considering to withdraw, on the other hand I felt relieved in some way that he took care of himself and took precautions by involving more of Sam Coates and Steven Geraghty and acompany, train them, give them more responsibilities. I was blind to another possible reason and I wanted to be blind.
I honestly believe that Robert made
Once an Angel be the album opener on purpose. Here, in my opinion, he expresses his wish for Libera to continue. And beginning the album like this shows how important Libera was to him and how much he cared.
So far, I haven't listened to any of the pre-released songs, because I prefer to listen to the album as one for the first time and since Robert's death it still hurts anyway. And so this is just a view on the upcoming album "from the outside". I'm torn between longing for the release and fear of the sorrow which will catch me again. But I know it will be an outstanding, wonderful album and self-evidently I will listen as soon as I can, being sure that Robert wanted us to enjoy it, and so the anticipaton prevails! It's a very personal album: retrospective, status quo and foreshadowing all in one CD, and there's one thing I know for sure: This will be my most intense listen to a new album ever.
Finally I'd like to emphasise that I'm well aware that all of the above is my personal view and that I may be mistaken in many points. I surely won't claim any insight into Robert's thoughts or intentions! Just my very own feelings.